little feet

Mark 10:15
"Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receieve the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."






My Sweet Nieces.         
                 

Sometimes I think that God gave me nieces to experience the joy & ache of parenting, before I become one.

Once I had to leave the country for 3 months, and for the first time in my short existence on the planet, I felt a physical ACHE of MISSING someone.  She has not even invested much in our relationship (she was 1) but the hurt I felt being so far away, drove me not only to open a MYSPACE account (much more popular back then) so I can see the pictures of her growth, but also to write her a letter, that I will give her when she is older. 

How odd is that, writing a letter to a 1 year old.  Then again, maybe not odd at all.  God has written me a letter, before I was even conceived.  He has loved me so much, before I could comprehend any of it.  Not that I can fully understand His love towards me now..
..............

Babies, toddlers, they are just adorable.                       

They are so huggable, kissable, eatable.


I especially love their little feet.

Their feet are unstained by the world. Clean.

Their feet are innocent.  Very Soft.

They go only where their parents lead.  Dependent.  Trusting.

 

The soul inside the little person is eternal.

They say things as they are, they don’t pretend.  And when they do, it’s clear – they’re bluffing! 

They cry and scream, they throw a fit, and then they come and climb on your lap. Their little arms around your neck,

and your response is one – you melt. 

What happens when we grow older?

Our feet change. 
Now they have been places…

The little child inside each one of us remains, yet thru the years we perfect the skill. 

Performing.  Putting on an act. 
An act that we have it all together. We act the fact. 

We perform in family, work, ministry…. Practice makes perfect – right?  And often, because of so much practice, we are perfect at being someone, something else.  We lose ourselves.  We disconnect.  Dissociate, from the God created child inside.

That child, precious little soul, abandoned, living on its own.  

We’re orphans.  Lost.  Forgotten.  Scared.

Yet we… continue to pretend. 

Pretending has become my home. It’s who I am.

Pretending I am so strong.

And so I come, before the Throne. 

The One that spoke me into being,

The One that gives to all its meaning.

He looks at me, like at a child. 

He knows... I am clearly LYING.